biLa raSa iTu daTanG........

Salam... ukhuwwah fillah...

I

Berat...

Sarat...

Kelat...

Ketuk...!!

Berat panca saujana lihatku

Sarat kelopak tampuk observasiku

Kelat rasa cipta inderaku...

Ketuk....!! Ketuk...!!

Bukan pintu hati... --> MUKA = buruk...

tapi salur pundi... --> PENUH = sudah teruk...

Lepas keluar, balik masuk...

(sedut sirap sejuk)

Duduk empuk...

Hilang kantuk...

Hadam keropok...

Mata dah tak lagi mengantuk...

Janji masa melalu lapuk...

Pencuri masa itu aku...

Perampok itu aku...

Ya... perampok...

II

Letih...

Masa mengengsot payah...

Panjang...

Perit...

Sakit...

Konfusi!

Politikus kritikus mampus...

Kepala putar...

Otak pusing...

Pening...

Tak tahu nak pilih...

Mana satu dituju...

Jiwa kaku...

Kacau...

Berang...

Mulut-mulut luas berbau longkang...

Otak kosong hati sampah...

Sumbang...

Tutur tak bertimbang...

Rasional menerawang...

Lorong-lorong kelangkang...

Sungguh bangang...

Gampang...

Pekung dibuang...

Dada terpelahang...

Diri songsang...

Mental melayang...

Kepayang...

Takhta menjalang-jalang...

Malang...

MAAF...

Teman bayang...

Bosan ceramah panjang...

+ bagus juga dapat rujukan membuat resume yg baik +

LenSa muRahkU beRakSi di QLatE....

Salam... ukhuwwah fillah...

Aku kembali....

Semula....
Bernafas....

Kaki kami...

Kakiku dan Ombak...

kaMi peRnaH di Sana...

aLam cantik...

LAUT = Indah...

Bila Senja Datang...

aKu berSYAHdu...

harga = tak mahal... RM199 + RM30 for 1G memory card...

lokasi belian = Low Yat

nama = KingCom Digicam (bukan KingKong tahu...)

kehebatan = camera ni 5mp jer tapi boleh up jadi 10mp... hampir standard sebuah D40X...

hasil = worth it...

komen = mari beli...!!

AKU = puas... melepas gian bergambar...

aLL i waNteD...

Salam... ukhuwwah fillah...

…this has got nothing to do with any song title you’ve ever heard…and this is not a poem…so, don’t read like one…

I don’t know if we actually understand the meaning of life…

During the good years that we live, the good and bad things we’ve been through

Until this very long 20 years I’ve been living

I still don’t understand what I truly want; to do, to have, to achieve, to prove, to show to the world, to keep to myself till the day I die…

I am never satisfied of what I own

And I am wondering what I would do in the years to come

I just shared my loneliness with myself (again) alone…

I don’t make myself promises

I could never keep them well

I am always a forever follower

Because I don’t actually have what I pretend to have

They just remained as unrealized desires…

Sometimes I want to fly up there so high

Sometimes I want to crawl down here, force a fake smile and lie

I am always a copy of someone else or something I adore

I am never the person of my own self…

I want to do things that give big impacts

I want to pretend being happy though my tears are streaming down fast

I want to be great, achieving something that would smash others with a blast

I just want to write something powerful

But I realize I’m just copying off someone else’s poems

I want to speak so fluently, so powerfully so that I can rule

But I know I am just imitating words, and I would just annoy those who listen to them

I want to be known of my own wisdom

But I realize I’m just making up something that I don’t really have…

I tried to be someone else

I am frustrated of being me

I dream to be some other person I always wanted to be

I once let myself fell apart, because I fail to be sure

To think about things positively, that had never occur

So I break every part in me with wounds I couldn’t cure

I cried so hard, I couldn’t speak of me anymore

But then I looked into myself… very deeply down to the core

I found something…

That for so long I’ve been looking for…

I found ME…

And it made me open my heart suddenly…

I want to be proud of myself

I want to be known as good people

I want to be rich – in material, heart and soul…

I want to be wise, no longer making the wrong decision

I want to be true, no more lie and pretend

I want to be good, no more having bad thoughts of the people around me

I want to be happy and make others happy

I want to be cheerful so naturally without a fake smile

I want to be positive and slash all the negativity

I want to be inspirational, not only to myself but everyone I see

I want to be free so I don’t have to follow or being tied to anybody

I want to be lovable, so that I would have some space to love and let others love me

I want to be close to my Lord, and let Him love me in return

I want to be thankful just for all that I have

I want to be just fine

Gathering all my good pieces that I left behind

And start a new day…

A new ME…

As my motivation and spirit levitate

I got a promise, one to myself I made

And I know I got no time to hesitate

I want to achieve all the things I desire with my own bare hands

I want to kill all the envy in me, and just be me that I am able to be

I want to speak freely, hide nothing in me, as long as I don’t hurt anybody

I want to stand in front of the world, shining bright and feeling afraid no more

I want to breathe in peace, share all my love I have

I want to smell all the flowers I see, but let go of those that I can’t keep

I want to shout to the sky, so that my voice can be heard all over the universe

I want to smile with all my heart and shed less drops of tears…

I will not keep my voice inside of me…stop being invisible, as it kills me slowly…

I want to live so peacefully…

I no longer want to be anybody else but ME…

Kau Pijak Kepalaku Lagi...

Salam... ukhuwwah fillah...


Lagu latar : Kau Pijak Hatiku Lagi...
Kondisi cuaca : Hujan
Emosi Hati : Kurang Stabil...


Celik saja mata... pagi ini... sakit hati...
Hati perit... tapi tak tahu nak balut bagaimana lagi...
Rasa nak baling... henyak... belasah... mati...
Geram... terbakar lagi... tensi...
Susah nak fahamkan orang yang tak mengerti...
Bukan bodoh jahil dungu... cuma bangang tak mahu memahami...
Kata-kata gampang menyanyi-nyanyi dalam hati...
Bila sial yang tak memahami tu memijak kepalaku lagi...
Tiba-tiba rasa nak nyanyi...
Maaf, Hujan... aku lakukan modifikasi pada lagu kamu ini...
Liriknya cantik aku gemari...
Tapi untuk saat aku sakit hati ini....
Biarkan aku nyanyi ikut rasa hati....

"Babi.... engkau memang babi....
Izinkan aku mencaci sialmu lagi....
Kau pijak kepalaku lagi...
Kau pijak kepalaku lagiiiiiiiiii........"

Maaf, aku puas begini...
Bila aku sakit hati, terus jadi kurang stabil mentaliti...
Kepala aku dah lunyai sebek dipijak kaki...
Orang-orang bodoh punya kaki...
Berak merata aku dah tolong cuci...
Habis bersepai lelah keringat aku tak ada siapa peduli...
Sakit lagi...
Sakit hati lagi....
Bodoooohh.... babiiiii.....!!!

Maaf... aku jarang mencaci...
Cuma sesekali...
Bila aku sakit hati...
Aku bukan diri aku lagi...
Maaf mencaci maki...

Sudah... pergi...
Aku peduli apa kalau kau sakit hati...

Syurga atau Neraka, Flava atau Modul...??

Salam... ukhuwwah fillah...

Seminggu lalu yg sangat letih... tapi best... turun naik ofis fakulti setelkan trip ~ tunggu approval dekan on proposal, mintak sign sane sini, wat letterhead kat abg mirul, bla... blaa... dan blaaa.... ~ aku betul2 FLAT... tapi flat pada last weekend memberikan aku a sense of kebestan dalam kelelahan... (ape aku cakap nih...?) banyak sangat nak cite nih... let us go through ape yg dah berlaku dalam idup seorang aku spanjang ujung minggu lalu...

First...

Pergi ke Dewan Sivik MBPJ menonton teater 'Syurga atau Neraka?'... penat jugak berkejar mengerjakan kerja sebab pukul 6.00 petang dah kena standby di post guard depan tu. Kalau tak, xleh pulak nak nonton teaternye. Hurm... about the show, leh bagi salute lah dekat Khusiary Mahayuddin sebab berjaya menteaterkan naskhah Raja Azriey yang 'so-so' good arh kiranye... idea cerita simple, berkisarkan di sebuah bilik mayat je, tentang mayat2 yang berkongsi kisah hidup mereka sebelum menuju alam seterusnya... dan semua kisah mereka bersangkut paut antara satu sama lain... hurm... ade pulak satu fasa transit lepas dah mati kan... adehh... tapi kalau direnung2 kan, ada banyak sangat pengajaran yg menginsafkan kalau menonton hingga akhir cerita (gile tak naik bulu roma bila soal mengingati TUHAN diperingatkan...rasa kerdil... sungguh... betul....)

Set superb, bilik mayat yg di setup atas stage tu kire make-believe arr... menjadi jugak lar seramnye ditambah dengan efek bunyi, lighting suram merah hijau, gimik prolog antu pocong kluar dari blakang tempat penonton... aku memang penakut tapi kadang2 berani pulak... haih... entah... konfius... all in all, plot penceritaan semacam longgar, menguap jugak sekali dua tiga kali.... sesekali aku menoleh ke kiri memandang kopi dan sesekali ke kanan melihat along... seronok duduk dgn bebudak junior nih... banyak ilmu yang dikongsi... aku memang suke berkuliah tak mengira tempat...

Paling best, dalam tak sampai setengah jam show bermula, terdengar paluan kompang meriah dari luar pintu... aku mati2 ingat itu memang efek yang diselit untuk scene tu, tapi bila diamati, rupanya tidak... bunyi datang dari luar, menyambut kedatangan jemputan kehormat mungkin.... aku geleng kepala... redha jela... but the show must go on...

Berapa bintang aku mahu bagi? Entah.... mungkin aku hanya suka watak Iman (Raja Azriey) dan Senin (Che Mat raja Lawak)... aku memang suka Raja Azriey sejak watak dia dalam Blok 404 dengan watak Mat Din tu... psikotik, sinikal, sesuatu... memang sampai hari ni aku ingat keselambaan dia dalam lakonan... but seriously, tanpa diorang, memang tak berseri kut show malam tu... nak harapkan diorang jer as penghidup cerita.... yang lain2 tu bukan tak bagus langsung... cuma tak berapa membekas... watak bapa Iman yg mati kemalangan dilanggar Mat Rempit tak real langsung... sakit kakinya nampak fake... same goes to watak Ani Mayuni sebagai Zarina... tiap kali tiap saat, gelaknya plastik sungguh... tapi takpe lah, aku tak kisah pun... tak jejaskan the whole story deliver... mesej sampai dan aku terkesan.... boleh lah dikatakan... tapi xleh blah bila aku terpusing menoleh beberapa kali ke belakang bila diganggu suara dengkuran seorang makcik di sebelah kiri yang sedang enak menganga mulut menadah langit.... ditambah lagi dengkur anak lelakinya (aku consider budak lah lagi...) di sebelah kanan aku pula... hurm... teater yang bosan...? atau mereka insan yang tak pandai menilai seni lalu berkeputusan melelapkan mata dalam kedinginan dewan yang mencengkam...?

AKU = tiada komentar.... =)

Cerita hari Jumaat abis di situ....

Second...

Pergi membantu rakan2 taufan -Turntable Production- shooting untuk projek klip video mereka. Memang bukan subjek aku, tapi seronok membantu... entah kenapa... belum abis sunburn shooting lembu raya minggu lalu, aku turun lagi menolong. Kali ni kat pantai, Bagan Lalang, di Sepang Goldcoast - one of the reason aku ikut same... suke pantai....! weeee....) Artis dipilih - Flava. You guys really rawkk...! Sume giler -Shahdan, Syafiq, Add, Farouk + Arif... memang sangat havoc lepak dengan mamat2 nih... Lagu diorang Kenapa Singgah Kalau Tak Masuk, mula2 aku pun wat bodo jer denga kat radio, plus mak aku marah aku dengar lagu yang salah tatabahasa ~ tapi sejak dua menjak~ takde dalam kamus bahasa katanya... huhu... mak aku... mak aku... namun begitu, aku mula ter'tangkap' dengan lagu ni start malam final induction, bila tengok live performance Syuk and the gank + Serambi... you guys rawkk... sa-bermula dari itu, lalu aku pun mula menyiulkan lagu tersebut hingga berjaya tersenarai dalam top list lagu2 lalakan aku dalam bilik air serta menjuarai ranking top song dalam MP3 aku yg tercinta.... adeihh....

Hurm...dari sebuta2 subuh pagi, aku dah mengorak langkah angkat barang2 teknikal masuk kereta... naik bas, Flava dah tunggu siap2... gile awal... salute.... sepanjang perjalanan aku lelap je, caj bateri... aku agak aritu akan all-out kerja sebab diorang shooting sehari tu jer... tak macam time aku dulu, dapat tiga hari...

Sehari yang sangat letih, FLAT tahap hampeh tapi seronok entah knapa.... maybe sebab shoot kat pantai cantik kut, aku happy jer sbb dapat tengok laut... shooting yang lancar aku kira - tolak tepi sikit kekecohan setup scene, teknikal equipment lompang, talent se*** (oops...), hal kecik2 dan sebagainya... biase lah, mane ade shooting yg perfect takde masalah langsung, ye tak...? huu... tapi alhamdulillah sume under control... sume masalah dapat overcome and all ended up okay... malam baru sampai balik Puncak, lepak di kandang jap makan... sembang lagi dgn dak2 Flava... diorang memang friendly, borak tak ingat... dah abis shoot baru tahu diorang ni tak layak panggil abang pun... ramai adik lagi... adesss... aku bajet kondifen panggil abang sumenye... dan adesss lagi... iskk...

Cerita ari Sabtu abis di situ...

Third...

Pergi ke modul PPKP mengulang semula (dalam bahasa lain, REPEAT...) bukan sebab aku ponteng ye.... tapi berlaku kesalahfahaman sebab mase Modul Part 3 dulu aku di Port Dickson ikut trip K.I.K lepas menang mase konvensyen. Konon ada surat pelepasan tapi rupanya aku tetap kena repeat sebab tidak berjaya menghadirkan diri dan nama aku tiada di situ... hurm...

Pepun, lagi havoc rasenye join Modul dgn adik2 Part 3 nih... naik pening kepala agaknya Tuan Asmadi and Hajar yang jadi fasi kitorg.... walaupun content modul memang boring macam biasa ~ belajar struktur organisasi, apa itu minit mesyuarat, blaa.. blaaaa... ~ it turned out aku paling banyak cakap - sejak azali aku begini..... tapi tengok tempat jugak lah... - abis modul dalam kul 5 petang... aku pegi mendobi baju... trase bodo kejap sebab tak reti pakai machine and card dobi tu... adeihh... tapi last skali bjaye basuh jugak walaupun terlupa nak letak softener.... huhuuu...

Cerita ari Ahad abis di situ....

+ seronok dengan hari2 dalam minggu lalu... seronok bekerja bersama kalian... salam kenal sahabat2 baru... =) +

Final Destination 3

Salam... ukhuwwah fillah...

I was a kinda late catcher to get to watch this cool movie just last night... it was out in the year 2006, and i took quite a long time to watch it... think i was chilled and freezed to the bone... and i promised not to have another roller coaster ride (the last time i took one was like two weeks ago...been to Genting Highland and rode the Solero Spaceshot and The famous Corkscrew...) until i feel okay again to have a ride.... man, my stomach lurch as i say this...
About the movie, i borrowed a DVD from a friend and she recommended me this Final Destination 3 (once, i got myself confused with this sequal and the movie Final Fantasy... funny ay...) and indeed, it was a blast... the warning before the movie started says 'Advisable for children aged 17 and below to WATCH UNDER PARENTAL GUIDE... seriously full of chilling thrill, because so far, even the most scary movie in malaysia underlined the age limit for children to watch such movies is under 13... so, i thought to myself, whoa.....this is much more scary than you have ever imagined...
actually, i was kinda dissappointed because the mystery was left unsolved (who caused all the coincidences - the pictures, the hints, the turn after turn of dying - till they find their tragic deaths, ghost? fate? a distracted spirit that has to do with the roller coaster at the carnival? or is it just something unexplainable? hurm....) but then i realized, not all things need a clear explaination, sometimes we just ignore the truth of it and enjoy the sense of mysterious element of the movie...
Watching it alone, at 2.00 in the morn and finished at 4.00, i admit i was scared to go to bed... everyone was soundly asleep, while i was crawling slowly under my blanket, ready to face any possibilities of death coming to catch and grab me off my bed... the actions were so real (i even watched all behind-the-scenes after the movie) i love how they work the green screen techniques, the marvellous bloodwork (using some red colouring and crushed bananas representing the pieces of dead meat....) I didn't follow all the sequals (still looking for Final Destination 1 & 2...)... James Wong really did a good job for all his three films...
and i wonder, when would malaysian film industry stand in line with those made in hollywood... i'm waiting so eagerly...



* do not sleep alone tonight.... and don't boast that you're not scared not a bit after watching this movie...